Change & Growth

My horoscope for today, according to Yahoo

One of your friends keeps going on and on about how they are changing and growing, but you’ve yet to see any real evidence of this transformation. Before you call them on their baloney or tell them that they are fooling themselves, think about what they really need right now — your support, not your criticism. So be patient and understand that sometimes real change takes real time — it doesn’t always happen dramatically. Encourage them to keep going, and they’ll be able to.

Now first let me say that I would never in a million years tell a friend that I didn’t see any real evidence that they were changing and growing! How can we ever know what is going on inside another person, no matter how close we are? I would just never never never do that.

But reading that paragraph did make me think about visible change versus the tumultuous kind of change that happens inside and can drive you nuts, but may not show on the outside until way after it’s completed and done, and you’ve moved on to new growth. Sometimes we know we’re in a period of serious growth, and it can be delightful or difficult, but we know we’re changing big time. But do others see it in us? Not always. You don’t always get credit for all the growing you’re doing. Then other times you do something minor like cut your hair, or start wearing more of one particular color, or anything else that really didn’t require much thought on your part, and suddenly everyone around you starts to comment on all the changes you’re making, and how much you’re growing – and you want to say “Really?”

Personally I embrace change with one arm, and push it away with the other. I love change that I choose, and hate change that is forced upon me. And I almost always feel like exciting things are on the horizon, and like I’m chasing after change and growth as fast as I can go. I hate feeling stuck! And right now, I have to admit I do feel a little stuck. It’s hard not to feel stuck in this economy. But I know the cure for feeing stuck – it’s embracing change with both arms – and I can do that. It may not always be visible from the outside, but that’s okay. No one I know would dare tell me they didn’t see any real evidence of change or growth. My friends are much too polite for that…

Snow in Idyllwild // Photo: Cheryl Spelts

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